"Stop it, Marlena."
Roman's words are augmented by his touch, impossibly gentle against her skin. With a whispered word of love, he brushes his lips across her forehead and then tenderly, he touches his fingers beneath her chin and raises her head so that she has to look at him.
"Listen sweetheart. You did what you had to do to survive. I mean, you think I would have wanted you to go through with a pregnancy, thinking it might be Orpheus' kid?" He givers her a half-smile, meant to reassure her but she feels so wretched she's not sure that anything can make her feel better right now. She could almost welcome the oblivion of being Grace, just to ease this agony.
Which, of course, is the whole point.
"All I need to know," Roman tells her as he wraps both of his arms around her and pulls her close to him, "is that I got you back. I got you back in my arms and that's *all* I care about. The rest is just water under the bridge. It's the past and it's finished and done with. And I don't want you revisiting it and making yourself ill over it, okay?"
Almost without pausing, he looks up at his children, singling Eric out with his intense gaze. "Understand now, kid?" he demands, almost cruelly.
"Yeah," Eric's voice comes but it's hoarse and strained. "God, I'm sorry Mom. Really, I had *no* idea."
When she finds her voice, it's hoarse and it sounds flat and empty to her own ears. "Of course you didn't, honey," she tells him wearily. "I wish you didn't have to know. I wish none of this had come about. But it did and so..." she shrugs, almost welcoming the numbing effect of the exhaustion as it seeps through her body.
There's a silence and Marlena finds herself looking up at Sami. Her daughter, her arms still around Belle, returns her stare with a guarded, almost suspicious one of her own. She looks as if she wants to say something, as if she almost starts and then stops herself. Belle just looks distraught, with her eyes closed and tears trickling down her cheeks and Marlena feels her heart breaking all over again.
Roman, his insides churning with grief and rage, can barely speak for a long moment. He'd had no idea this was coming; the depths that Stefano has sunk to shock even him. The pain that Marlena must have suffered; the loneliness and grief... but he can't let himself think about that right now. He has to stay strong so that she can lean on him. He has to see her through this before they can have the private space to grieve that they both so badly need. But right now, he needs to get them all past this, has to make sure they keep moving onward.
So, he takes over the narrative again, deftly moving the family beyond the years spent in Stefano's employ to the recent months. He explains again about the accident and how when Marlena had awoken, it was Grace that had taken over Marlena's life. The room is silent but for his words, which fall into the shocked and soundless space that separates them all.
"I think all of us knew that something was wrong with Marlena, that something was going on with her and she wasn't behaving like the Marlena we know and love."
"Understatement of the year, bro." Bo manages to spit out the words, aimed at breaking the silence, at easing the tension a little. In that vein, he raises his eyebrows and then directs a wry grin at his older brother.
"Yeah," Roman allows himself a rueful smile, grateful to Bo for giving him some badly needed support. "Grace was hell-bent on getting some kind of revenge for the pain she felt I had caused her." He looks at Caroline and Shawn, his eyebrows raised and a half-frown curling his mouth. "She wanted us *all* to suffer for abandoning her. But I think that deep down there was more going on than just that. I think she couldn't bear that we all seemed to love Marlena so much. She couldn't reconcile it with what Stefano had told her. And her entire existence as Grace depended on that series of lies. So she needed to prove herself right. She wanted to make us hate Marlena, to abandon her like we did before so that she could feel justified in what she had done, in who she was."
"Wow," Marlena is shaken as she looks at him with new eyes. This insight is as unexpected as it is accurate. Although she's not sure why that should be so, she still finds herself a little unnerved by his assessment of her. Of Grace. "You've really thought about this."
"I've thought about nothing else since I worked out that she wasn't you, Doc." A smile tugs at the corners of his mouth and he looks at her thoughtfully before lifting his fingers to brush the remnants of the tears from her cheeks. "I should have figured it out long before I did. It wasn't you; you never would have said the things you said. However true the words were, you never would have deliberately set out to hurt me. Or any of us."
"But I did," she whispers sadly.
"No, not *you*." He shakes his head firmly. Then he turns back to his parents. "Anyway, when I did figure it out, I knew that the only way to get Marlena back was to get Grace away from Stefano and work on trying to reach Marlena somehow. So that was what I did." He looks around the family, his eyes sad. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you before we left
"You couldn't have clued us in and trusted us not to let on?" Sami asks angrily. "You must have seen that we were all hurt and confused and wondering what the hell was going on."
"Of course I did Samantha," Roman says with more patience than his daughter deserves. "But if I'd told you, then your reaction to her would have changed. Grace was a very smart lady and she would have picked up on it, no matter how good an actress you were. And all of the rest of you... it was the same situation. I knew Grace was very wary and cautious and I also knew Stefano was keeping a close eye on the situation. And as it turned out, they *were* planning to leave town, which is why I had to make my move and grab her when I did. All I could do was hope to God that I could find a way to get Marlena back before Stefano caught up with us. And that you would all understand why I had to do it that way."
"Well, obviously, it worked, son." Shawn nods at Marlena. "I have to confess, I was right upset at ye, so I was. But now, I feel I understand why ye did what ye had to do."
"I think we both do," Caroline looks at her husband for a long moment and then she turns to Roman and Marlena on the couch, her expression infinitely softer and more sympathetic than it was earlier. "The things I said earlier Marlena. I apologize. Bo and John are right. We should have known that something was wrong. That you would never behave like that under normal circumstances. We're.... *I'm* sorry. I should have had more faith in you."
"Please don't apologize, Caroline," Marlena shakes her head defiantly. "You have nothing to be sorry for. You didn't know that I wasn't... me. And besides that, what I did, the things I said, they were unforgivable in any context. The apologies are all mine to make, and I want you to know how sorry I am for all the things I said and did."
"The things that *Grace* said and did," Roman corrects her, a smile dancing in his eyes. Marlena knows that now Caroline has cracked, he thinks the worst is over, that they have forgiven her and that they are coasting on the downhill run to home. She knows that's not the case, but she will ride on his infectious enthusiasm for just a moment. After all, it's a blessed relief not to feel the crushing weight of disapproval and blame even if for a few minutes.
"What happened then?" Belle asks; her face ashen as she struggles with the weight of all this new knowledge. Marlena desperately wants to go to her and take her in her arms but she's not sure that's the right thing to do now. Belle needs to be able to trust her again before she can accept comfort from her.
"It's a long story," Marlena smiles wearily, "that starts with a shack in the middle of
"And it ends in New Orleans," Roman finishes the sentence for her as he absently twists his fingers in her hair and rubs her upper arm with his other hand.
"Let's just say that your father was *very* intent on his task." She smiles lovingly at her husband, lifting her hand to stroke his cheek with her fingers. "He would *not* give up, no matter what Grace threw at him. It didn't matter how hard she fought him. He simply fought her harder. He was relentless and he *never* gave up. He was always there fighting for me and in the end..." she lifts her fingers to his temple and brushes his hair back in a gesture of such tenderness that for a moment, Roman feels like they are the only people in the room. "...Grace started to crack," she finishes with a smile.
"She was a tough nut," he returns her smile with a grin that brings an extra sparkle to her eyes. "She fought all right. But every so often, I could see through the chinks in her armour. Sometimes she was just like a spoilt, lost child. Sometimes...." he looks up at the children, his shimmering cerulean gaze meeting that of his middle daughter, "she reminded me of Samantha. Vulnerable and lost and frightened and trying to cover it all with a mask of anger and indifference." He sees Sami start angrily and can't help the tender smile that steals across his face. Then he turns back to Marlena, the smile turning into an incorrigible smirk. "And sometimes she was simply infuriating and I could have quite cheerfully strangled her."
Marlena returns his smile before laying her head on his shoulder. She can feel the buzz of his voice deep within his chest, vibrating against her cheek as he talks. It's comforting and it feels like the safest place she's ever known, just nestled there against his chest. Momentarily, she wonders how she could ever give this all up, before she is caught up again in his words.
"But I just knew I had to keep trying and keep fighting to get to Doc. And all the while, the truth that Grace thought she knew, it was being worn away, little bit by little bit. So, she decided to head for
"What truth?" Kayla asks from where she stands, slightly behind her father.
"Hey there Kay!" Roman smiles at his younger sister, an irresistible flash of a grin that Marlena hasn't seen for the longest time. "Well, see, it turns out Stefano had a second house down there that we didn't know about. So Grace and...I," he looks at Marlena and she nods almost imperceptibly. They don't need to know what the mercenary had done. They already know too many painful details; that can stay private. "Grace and I broke into the house and found Stefano's secret stash of files. Dossiers on just about everything he's ever been involved in."
"Made some really interesting reading," Bo adds. "What little we saw of it before the Feds got their hands on it, anyway. The material in that room alone is gonna send DiMera down for a long, long time."
"Stefano DiMera is in jail?" Shawn Brady looks even more shocked.
"Actually, right about now, he's in a plane with Abe and several FBI agents and they're probably somewhere over
"Stefano turned up in
"Deal with you?" Eric asks carefully.
"I'd become a liability," Roman tells them all. "I was too close to Grace. Far too close. Stefano knew that she must have had a chance to escape and yet, she was still with me. He couldn't abide that. I was interfering and that Grace was choosing me. Obviously," He looks at Marlena, picking up a strand of hair and smoothing it over her shoulder, "he wanted Grace for himself. They had a strange relationship; she never would have touched him, but he was hopelessly in love with her. Just as he was with you, Doc. But at least Grace would work with him. He could have her close to him, have her do his bidding. Although in the end, he wouldn't have been able to bear having her that close and not being able to touch her..." He looks at Marlena, passion glittering in his eyes. "I know only too well how that one works. It's *hell* being able to look but always being just a little more than an arms length away."
"That was your choice," Marlena tells him, moving even closer to him so that she almost melds into him within the embrace of his arm.
"Only choice I could make baby," he shrugs. "Couldn't break down Grace's defences by giving her what she wanted, could I?" He leans over and presses a tender kiss to her lips. "Was damn hard though," he whispers before turning back to the family.
"Well, Stefano he decided he was going to have me killed." There is a gasp from Belle, but Eric's arm around her hugs her closer to him, wordlessly urging her to allow her father to tell the story in his own time. She takes the hint and says nothing more, simply looks at her father in anguish. "But before he got to that point, he took the time to tell me some home truths. He was furious with me, well, with the mercenary really, for not bending to his will, not playing his game. He had an agenda and I didn't fit into it. The same way I'd never really fit into it I guess." He shrugs. "So to punish me, he told me who I really am. Gave me back the past, dangled the truth in front of me in order that it would hurt all the more when he took it away forever." His voice grows strained and haunted, his blue eyes growing dim with the memories of that hot, humid night in
"Couldn't believe him at first. But Grace confirmed it. The file she had, that she'd taken with her. It was all in there. I *hadn't* been implanted with the memories of Roman Brady. The truth was, I'd been brainwashed and implanted with the memories of John Black. Father John Black, the priest and mercenary *did* work for Stefano all those years ago. But he died after a job gone wrong in
"No!" Caroline gasps, lifting her fists to her mouth. "No John!" She faces him defiantly. "Roman was here. He *died*!"
"And there were tests," Kayla adds, her eyes shining with bewilderment. "Shane took DNA samples to the ISA lab. *Roman* was... Roman. Not you."
"No," Marlena says bitterly. The hatred in her voice is blistering. "He wasn't Roman. Stefano pulled his greatest coup when he sent Lamont back in Roman's place. I lived with that man for three years, thinking he was my husband. And all the time, he was Robert Lamont."
"No, it can't *be*," Shawn whispers, horrified at the implications of what John and Marlena are saying. "He remembered.... He had Roman's memories. All of Roman's memories. He was our son, I know he was."
"Pop," Bo says gently. "I know this is hard to accept." He grimaces. "Believe me, when they told me, *I* fought it as hard as I could. I read all the files but I couldn't accept it was the truth. Because what would it mean? That we turned our back on Roman and welcomed a stranger into our family? We turned our back on Roman.... And I couldn't believe it. Wouldn't accept it. But Hope..." he smiles at his wife and without equivocation she leaves her place on the sofa to come to his side. "She made me see sense. She made me really listen to what my heart was telling me and made me face some harsh truths. I didn't want to believe John was really Roman because that meant I was guilty of abandoning my own brother. Of turning my back on the one person who had always looked out for me."
"Noooo!" It's a whispered moan from Sami and Marlena's tears her gaze away from Bo and Hope to look at her daughter. She is standing emotionally stranded and miserable with her arms wrapped around herself in a protective gesture that makes Marlena's heart ache. Her poor, wounded girl; how will she ever come to terms with this? How will she ever be able to reconcile with the knowledge of how this changes her childhood?
"I understand that you don't want to believe this. Shawn, Caroline... Sami," Hope says softly. "It turns everything you've known about your family for ten years on its head. It means that the man we thought was Roman, the man we all loved; was nothing more than Stefano's would-be-rapist thug. A man he sent back to
"No," Marlena shakes her head sadly. "I was just as fooled as the rest of you. I accepted that... man..." her nose wrinkles in disgust and she pulls her fitted corduroy jacket closer around herself to ward off the imaginary chill in the air. "I took him into my home and into my bed." She tenses and swallows convulsively. "I'm just as guilty as anyone here. More so, in fact. I turned my back on my own *husband*... for *what*?" Her eyes glisten as she looks up at Shawn and Caroline. "The DNA tests... Stefano paid someone at the ISA lab to switch them. That's why we...." She stops short, her jaw trembling as she fights back more tears.
"Uh-uh Marlena," Hope shakes her head. "The truth is that Stefano might have fooled your head, but he couldn't fool your heart. You wanted to love the man you *thought* was Roman, but you couldn't really bring yourself to. You were drawn time and time again to John. You couldn't stay away from him any more than you could stop breathing."
"No!" Sami shouts and all faces turn in her direction. She is standing with tears streaming down her reddened face. "No! He is *not* my father! I know my father, I know who he is. John Black is NOT my father!"
"Oh honey!" Marlena cries involuntarily. She'd been so afraid of this.
"NO!" Sami rages. "You're liars! You want us to forgive you and you'll do anything to take the blame off *you*, take the attention away from you." Her sapphire eyes are flashing dangerously, her cheeks burning as the insults spill irrationally from her in a torrent of strangled half-screams. "You've lied and you've murdered and you've been Stefano's *whore*, so why the hell should I believe you now!? You're nothing but a filthy LIAR! God, both of you can GO TO HELL!"
Pushing her way past her stunned and distraught siblings, she dashes for the back door, sweeping a crystal vase from a side table so that it shatters in her wake.
And then she is gone, the door shuddering in its frame as she slams it behind her.
There is a shocked, pained silence that follows and it is broken by a sudden agonized exhalation of breath from Marlena before her hands fly to her mouth.
"Mom!" Belle almost trips over the table as she dives across the intervening space to her mother's side. "Oh God, Mom, don't listen to her. Please don't listen to her. I don't feel like that at all. None of us do!"
She is crying and it is all Marlena can do not to dissolve into helpless sobs in Roman's and Belle's arms. But she doesn't. She refuses to allow herself that kind of weakness in front of her family. She must be strong, for Roman. For all of them. Furrowing her brow, she presses her eyes tightly together and fights back the surge of pain.
"It's okay Doc," Roman whispers, pulling her to him. "It's okay. She'll get over this."
"He's right Mom," Eric's voice comes stilted and uncertain. "Sam's stronger than you might think. She'll work out what's best for Samantha Gene Brady and then she'll come back and expect us all to act as if nothing's happened, as if she never said anything at all."
Marlena manages to look up at her son and she nods with weak attempt at a smile. "Listen, why don't I go and see if I can find her?" Eric asks, running his fingers through his hair with obvious discomfort.
"No!" Marlena pushes herself upright, away from Roman, wincing at the pain which slashes through her side. "No. I'm going to go and find her. We're going to talk this out, once and for all."
"Do you really think that's a good idea, Doc?" Roman asks darkly. The implication is clearly that he definitely doesn't think that it's a good idea at all. That he's furious at his wayward daughter and thinks a good period of cooling off time is in order.
"Yes, I do actually," Marlena nods, her words curt and to the point. "Sami needs to come to terms with this, and she needs to do it quickly. Before the guilt eats her alive. You *all* do," she adds, looking at Roman's family. "You spent ten years believing Lamont was your son. And I know it's hard to let that belief go. But you *need* to, for Roman's sake, and your own." She says it without blame and without anger, but they can all feel the urgency and the pain that underpins her words. "He's lost *so* much time with his family. He's had his life taken away from him and you *owe* it to him not to take any more time and love from him." There's more than a hint of anger bleeding into her voice now and a challenge that does not brook any indifference. "And if you refuse to accept the truth, you're only punishing him and you're only hurting yourselves."
She looks around at the uncertain gazes of Shawn, Caroline, Kayla and Eric.
"Roman, for goodness sake; *show* them the DNA test results. I'll go and find Sami." She pushes herself away from him and stands up, biting the inside of her lip to stop from crying out as her wound pulls again.
"C'mon Doc," Roman stands and catches her arm in one swift moment. He sighs at her angry, pained glance. "You're not up to this, baby. You're supposed to be taking it easy, remember?"
"Roman, *please* let me go," she says curtly, suddenly feeling immensely claustrophobic. "I think I know what I'm up to. I'm *fine*, I don't need mollycoddling. What I do need is to find our daughter before she does something she very much regrets."
Marlena pulls her arm from Roman's hand and brushes past him.
"Doc!" He practically leaps over the arm of the couch and chases her to the door. She's in the doorway when she turns around to glare at him. The fury is emanating from her in waves and Roman stops short, held up by his surprise at the depth of anger he senses in her.
"Roman! Don't you *dare*!" Her voice is a low hiss. "You *promised* me that I could do this the way I needed to do it. Well right now I need to go and find my daughter and I need you to stay and talk to your family. And if you try and tell me once more that I'm an invalid, I think I'm going to scream." She grits her teeth as she lays her hand on the doorknob. "So I'm telling you now, just turn right around and go back to your family."
With that, she turns around and steps out of the pub, swinging the door behind her so that the slam of the door in the frame echoes through the empty square beyond....