"Oh God!" Marlena pulled away from John abruptly, blinking as her hands covered her belly protectively, the sudden lust all but forgotten.

"What is it baby?" John was immediately on his knees, helping Marlena sit up.
"OH," she hunched over her stomach in an intimation of distress.
"Doc?" he brushed the hair from her eyes worriedly, one arm bracing her shoulders. "Baby, tell me what's going on, please." It was hell as he waited for her answer and the seconds felt like a small eternity as the thoughts bounced around in his brain.

Oh God I knew it was a bad idea to take her away from Salem. What the hell was I thinking? What a bloody idiot. Oh God, please let her be all right, let the baby be all right.

"Oh," the groan emanated from Marlena's throat as her head fell backwards, her eyes closed.
"Oh c'mon baby, talk to me, please tell me you're okay." John brushed his fingers across her suddenly pale cheeks. "Please Marlena, you have to be okay, I don't think I could bear it if anything was to happen to you now." He had tears in his eyes as he pleaded with her, willing her to open her eyes and tell him that everything was fine.

Because if something was wrong, all the way out here in the middle of nowhere, they could well be in very big trouble.

It seemed like eons to John before Marlena finally lifted her head and opened her eyes.
"Doc?" he asked carefully. The pain in her eyes faded as she looked at him.
"I'm sorry," she said thickly, "he just kicked me and it seemed to set off a kind of a cramping sensation. I'm okay now."

"A cramp?" John looked worried. "That doesn't sound okay."
"It *is* okay," Marlena nodded with assurance. "These things happen occasionally. It wasn't a contraction kind of cramping. It's passed now."
"But Doc," John's face portrayed his deep concern for her, "can you be sure that it won't happen again? I mean we're out here in the middle of...." He shook his head angrily. "What the *hell* was I thinking bringing you out here? If something were to happen-"
"*Nothing* is going to happen," Marlena smoothed the deep furrows in his brow with gentle fingers. "Trust me John, I'm fine and the baby is fine and I am so incredibly glad you brought me out here. It's wonderful."

He looked unsure as he watched her, weighing up in his mind the chances they were taking by staying in the mountains against the obvious good it seemed to be doing her.
"I really don't think staying here is a good idea Doc," he said gently. "If you were to have another turn like you did the other night, if you were to go into premature labour, we'd never get to a hospital in time."
"It won't happen honey," she told him reassuringly. "I promise you. Please, please let's just stay okay?"

He said nothing for long moments as he watched her. The colour was already returning to her cheeks and her eyes were glittering as she looked out over the moonlit valley.
"It's so beautiful here," she whispered, "how could anything go wrong?"

"It could be the most beautiful place on earth Doc, but that's not going to make any difference to that kid in there if he decides he's coming out early." John pointed to her stomach. "I can't take any risks with you, I can't let anything happen to you, you know that."
"Nothing will happen, don't you think I'd know if there was something wrong?" she asked, trying to put his mind at ease. "It's not like this is my first pregnancy, I do have some idea what is going on with my body."
"I didn't say you don't Doc," John frowned uneasily. "But you know as well as anything how fast things can change. I mean it was only sheer luck that I was at the cabin when you were in labour with Belle....."
"And you managed wonderfully," she smiled at the memory.
"We were just *lucky* Doc," John said his voice low and intense. "We almost lost our little girl that night. Maybe we could handle it if something happened, but maybe we couldn't. What is the point in taking a risk with our baby's life? And yours," he added grasping her fingers in his and squeezing them tightly. "You're not the only one that gets frightened Marlena. The thought of losing you," a shiver ran through him even as the words caught in his throat. "I couldn't bear it."

"It won't happen," her eyes were bright in the silvery moonlight. "I understand your fears John, I have them too. But you can't wrap me in cotton wool. I'm a big girl and I can decide what's risky and what's not. And I don't think staying here is risky. It's only a few more days isn't it?"
"That's not the point Marlena," John was starting to get annoyed. She never changed; she was always so damned stubborn.
"Well what *is* the point John?" she pulled her hand away from his and her expression cooled.
"The point is that there *is* a risk and I'm not prepared to take it, even if you are." He began to pack up the picnic dishes. "We'll drive out in the morning."

"I wish you wouldn't do this," she said angrily.
"Do what?" he turned midnight eyes on her.
"Patronize me." She crossed her arms across the top of her belly. "I feel more relaxed and happier than I have in months. That has to be *good* for the baby. And I happen to think that outweighs any small risks." She felt a little hurt as she stared at him. "Do you *really* think I would put my own baby in any kind of danger?"

"Of course I don't Marlena," he sighed, dropping the dishes that were in his hands and sitting down next to her. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to imply that you would. I'm just...." He looked a little embarrassed. "Doc, you know I get overprotective. It's just how I am."
"Of course I know that," she couldn't help the smile that came to her face at his concession. "Doesn't mean I have to like it, or go along with it though. I think at this point, you need to trust my judgment. Because I really want to make the most of this time we have together and I really love it here...." She looked around at the silver-drenched landscape. "Please? Just trust me on this one. The baby is safe and so am I. The moment I feel that change, I promise I'll be the first one in the car to get home."

John looked at her for a moment and then turned to study the panorama in front of him. He chewed the inside of his cheek as he thought about her plea. Despite her assurances, he was still worried about the possibility of something happening. But if he didn't respect her judgment and took her home, how would that make things between them?

"All right," he conceded eventually. "We'll stay. But if you have so *much* as a twinge lady, I'm putting you in that car and taking you straight to the nearest hospital, you hear me?"
"Well that sounds like enough incentive to behave myself," she smiled as she rubbed the palm of one hand in circles over her rounded belly.
"Good," he frowned, "and right now, we are going back to the cabin and you are going to bed." He silenced her with a firm look that brooked no further arguments.

She stared back at him, wanting nothing more than to sit out here and drink in the beauty of the landscape that surrounded them. But it was her own body that turned traitor and sealed her fate as she gave way to a yawn.

"Right," John allowed himself a grin as he relaxed a little. He was willing to trust her but he would be watching her. And the moment it looked as though anything might be wrong, he was prepared to act. But for now, he would take her back to the cabin and tuck her into bed and hold her through the night.

It seemed that Marlena was right and the next few days at the cabin passed without incident. Marlena spent time reading in the sun while John fussed over her. They went for long, gentle walks along the valley floor, Marlena stopping to pick wildflowers on the way so that the cabin was filled with a profusion of poppies and cornflowers. She was as relaxed as John had ever seen her, her belly burgeoning almost daily and her face vested with the rosy glow of good health.

It had taken him several days to relax enough to completely enjoy himself, but once he was reassured that Marlena and the baby were both safe, John stopped worrying and started enjoying himself.

He called Salem when he could and was grateful to hear that things were going better than anyone could have hoped for. Eugene had settled in as Laura's houseguest and things seemed fine so far. At the loft, Mike and Maya had all but weaned Kristen off the sedative and oddly, she seemed to have no memory of her outburst at all. She even seemed to buy the story of him being on a business trip with remarkable gullibility. None of them were willing to take it entirely on faith however, and Maya was keeping a close eye on the newly acquiescent Kristen, waiting for any sign that she was about to crumble again.

But while those at home assured him that things were under control on that front, John determined to put all his energy into making sure that he and Marlena had a few precious days together to create memories that they would always cherish.

It was early on the morning of the seventeenth that John woke with Marlena stirring restlessly beside him.
"Doc?" he stroked his fingers over her arm. "Doc, are you okay?"
"Mmmm..." her eyes flickered open in the darkness, hugely gleaming with unspoken emotion. He couldn't tell what it was, if she'd been having a nightmare or if the baby was just making it uncomfortable to sleep.
"Are you okay baby?" he whispered, the concern flooding his voice.
"Mmmm...yeah," Marlena brushed her hair back off her forehead and raised herself up onto her elbows, blinking as her eyesight adjusted to the darkness. "Yeah. I was..." she searched back in her mind to locate the discomfort that lurked just below the surface.

When it came, she was sorry she had.

All she could see in the darkness was Stefano, standing before her, holding her baby in a death grip. And she, helpless to stop him.

"Doc?" John could see her visibly pale and she shivered as the visions from the dream assailed her. With gentle, warm hands, he helped her sit up. "Baby what is it?"
"I...I don't want to talk about it," she shook her head, her eyes focused on shaking fingers, hiding her face behind a cascade of pale hair.
"Doc," his voice was firm as he slid his finger under her chin and lifted her head so that she faced him. "I won't let you do this any more. I won't let you shut me out. If you're afraid of something, I want to know what it is."

She stared at him, eyes darkly hollowed by fear.
"Stefano," she said through suddenly chattering teeth. "I dream he has the babies."
"You *dream*?" he asked carefully. "You've had this dream before?"
"Variations of it," she whispered. "The other night...." she shivered, her flesh crawling with the memory of the horrific nightmare, "...both you and Gene were.... were dead... and he...... he and Kristen," she choked back a sob, "they had the babies."
"Oh sweetheart," he pulled her into his arms, enfolding her shaking form in his warm embrace. "It's okay. I promise you it'll be okay. There's no way Stefano will get anywhere near our babies."

"How can you say that John?" she pulled away from him, tears threatening to spill from clouded hazel eyes. "He got near Carrie didn't he? Not just once, but twice. You couldn't stop him taking her when I was gone. And you weren't there when he took the twins all those years ago. God, he just walked right in and *took* them. Right under my nose." She shuddered and cursed the fear that coiled around her rationality and choked it until it was non-existent. "Dammit, he's out there John. He's just waiting and toying with us until he decides to make his next move." She delved frustrated fingers through her blonde mane.

Now that she could no longer deny the truth that Stefano had been the one that had taken Carrie, pieces were starting to fall into place like a puzzle. A jigsaw puzzle. "He sent you that d*mn puzzle piece before the shooting." John had told her about the mysterious piece while he was in the hospital, but she had refused to believe that it had anything to do with Stefano. Stefano was dead and that was that. Except he wasn't dead. And that wasn't that. *That* was very much this.

"Doc, I won't lie to you," John shook his head. "I believe that Stefano sent that puzzle piece. But his plan backfired and he's off somewhere licking his wounds right now. Roman and Abe are on the case and as long as we keep one step ahead of the old man....." he sighed edgily. "He has to make a slip up some time Doc."

"Does he?" She shook her head almost desperately, her voice hoarse and pained. "In my dreams he doesn't John. He wins. He wins the whole game......" A tear slid muted and hot down her cheek. "I can't... I don't know how we can stop him. He just keeps on taking and I don't know how to stop him." Her fingers curled into icy fists as she shook visibly, her voice drowned in fear. "I don't know if we *can* stop him."

It was the first time she had really voiced her fear of Stefano, the admission that he was alive and back in their lives almost too much for her to cope with and she choked convulsively on the tears that seemed to swamp her.

"It's okay baby," John held her in his arms again, rubbing his hand in comforting circles over her back as she wept warm tears against his bare skin. "It's okay."

He *hated* the fact that Stefano had that kind of effect on her. He would never ever forget the day that Marlena had seen the old bastard when she was pregnant with Belle. He wasn't at all sure how she would cope if she were to come face to face with him now. He only knew he didn't want to find out. And he would *kill* DiMera with his bare hands to stop it from ever happening again. "We'll find some way of making the babies safe. I promise you. We'll all be safe."

Eugene lay on his back and stared at the ceiling. A new ceiling, with a thousand new marks to catalogue and store away in his mind. Information utterly useless, but information nonetheless.

He folded his arms behind his head and sighed softly. It wasn't so bad living at Laura Horton's. She was a nice lady and they were getting along fine so far. But it wasn't the same.

Which is rather the point isn't it? he chided himself.

It was definitely easier, that was for sure. But somehow life seemed to become sluggish as he missed that wonderful little spark of expectation that came as he saw her around a corner or caught a glimpse of her through a doorway. That moment where his heart jumped into his throat and his knees threatened to resemble a soft jelly. It was insane. He wanted to escape it, but God how he missed it.

What scared him the most was that he even somehow missed the dreams.

He sighed again and twisted under the sheets to where he could see the window. The moon shone brightly but even now he could see the ghost of a glow on the horizon where the sun would rise soon enough. Soon enough that he would have to face the fact that he had spent another night sleepless. Soon enough he would face another vacant day wondering why he even bothered.

"Oh Marlena," he muttered miserably. "I don't know how to do this. I don't know how to get over you."

"Why are you even trying?"

The voice comes as a whisper out of the darkness and it sends gooseflesh rippling over Q's exposed skin.

"No," he utters, disbelieving. "*No*!"

"Marlena?" John moved her trembling body away from him and dipped his head to find Marlena's reddened eyes. "Sweetheart, it'll be okay. Somehow, between us all, we'll make it okay."
"I know you will," she sniffed, wiping the remnants of grief and trepidation away with the back of her hand. "It's just. ...sometimes....... I get frightened John."
"I know you do baby," he took her hand in his, "you wouldn't be human if you didn't."

"I try not to let it get to me," she sighed, pushing back a lock of hair with the heel of her palm. "After all this time, you would think I would have learned not to let Stefano have this much control over me."
"You're a strong woman Doc, but you're not *that* strong," John said softly. "DiMera is like a d*mn cat with nine lives and you never know where he's going to pop up next. You'd be stupid not to be wary of him. Not be afraid."

"Are you afraid, John?" she asked suddenly, staring up at him with eyes that were pools of liquid gold.
"Of course I am sweetheart," he whispered, reaching out to stroke her cheek with a trembling finger. "Until we know for sure that he's dead, or behind bars, I'm never in control. I can only anticipate what he might do next." He gazed at her so intensely that it made her chest hurt as she remembered to take a breath. "I'll do anything to protect you Marlena. I'll give my *life* to see you safe."

"Don't *say* that," she said angrily, tears suddenly swimming at the edges of her lashes.
"Well it's *true*," he said in a low growl. "Don't you know how important you are to me?"
"What about how important you are to *me*?" She pressed her lips together so that they blanched a bloodless white. "Do you know what it does to me when you say things like that? I came so close to losing you once already. Please, *please* don't ask me to ever face that again."

"I won't lie to you Doc," he shook his head. "I would do *anything* in my power to make you safe. That's just the way it is. That's the way I feel about you and I can't change it. But if it makes you feel better," he sighed lightly as he saw her face, "I don't plan on leaving you any time soon."
"I'll never forgive you if you do," she said in a tightly serious voice. "Do you have any idea what it felt like to see you lying in that hospital bed and never knowing if I would see your eyes again? Or hear your voice? And that nightmare....." she shuddered, wrapping her arms around herself as though it was some kind of protection against the terrors that haunted her. "I didn't know that my mind was capable of creating such horrors." She shook her head, her eyes stinging with the salt of her dried tears. "But it's not simply a creation John. It's not inconceivable. You can make as many glib remarks as you like, but when it comes down to it...." Her breath came with a panicked convulsion. "I'm terrified that it will come true. That he will win, he'll take you from me and I will have to live without you. I just don't want to find out if I am capable of doing that."

"You won't." He shook his head angrily. "Dammit Doc, we've made it too far to lose now. I won't let that old bastard take any more happiness from us." He could feel the fury bubble up under his words. She was right, Stefano was apt to come out of nowhere and hit them like a freight train at full speed. But this time, he would just have to be ready for him. There was no other option.

The muscle in his jaw twitched as he looked again at Marlena and then his expression softened. "Neither of us is going anywhere baby. We're stuck with each other, so we may as well get used to it." He smiled tenderly and she eventually nodded, yielding gracefully. He knew that her fears weren't really assuaged and that they were more than valid, but they couldn't live their lives balancing on the edge of a knife blade, waiting for the smallest slip. They had to live every day as it was when they were together, the most precious thing in the world.

"Hey Doc," he grinned, "you up to going for a little drive?"
"Now?" she looked confused.
"Yeah now," he took her head and slipped around her and off the edge of the bed. "It's not long till dawn. And I want to see the sun rise with you by my side. I want the world to see how strong and good we are together." He tugged on the bedclothes and her satin nightgown rippled down over her thighs as she stood. "I want to start a new day with you, a new day in our new life. Whaddya say?
"I say it sounds like a great idea," she squeezed his fingers. "Let's go!"

Did I fall asleep and not realize? Am I hallucinating? No, I've just gone crazy. That's it. I've just completely lost my mind. Time for Q to lock me away in some forgotten corner, like the drooling idiot that I am.

"Gene," her voice washes over me like a ripple of sweet velvet, sinking into my blood, re-infecting me.

Not that I was ever cured.

Her fingernail scrapes against my chest, the lightest of touches sending jolts of agonizing pleasure straight to my groin.

"Sweet, dear Gene," she whispers as her fingers idly hook under the sheet and draw it back. Her golden eyes examine me critically and I find myself oddly breathless for a long moment.

This isn't real Q. You're making it all up in your head. You're mad. A veritable hatter. Get over it all ready.

But oh my God, her touch feels so damn real and her smell..... I can smell her, her fragrance mingling with the sweet spicy smell of her desire. Her desire for me.

"Oh baby," she lifts her fingers to her mouth and licks the end of her finger, almost in the way a cat might. Then she moves her finger towards me until I feel the cool wetness circling my nipple. I'm getting hard as she pinches me firmly. And not just there.

"Oh God!" the exclamation dies in my throat as she drops to her knees beside the bed and replaces her fingers with her hot, moist mouth. She licks and sucks me, teasing me as she runs her fingers over my chest and stomach.

And all the time, she watches me, searches me with the golden eyes of a hunter. Knowing she has snared her prey.

And suddenly I don't care if this is wrong. I don't even care if I've gone mad. I just want her so badly that I can taste it. Taste her. The need to feel her is almost unbearable and I catch her wrist between vice-like fingers as I sit up.

"*Q*!" Her voice comes in a shocked whisper but almost immediately a smile drifts across her sensual lips. "Oh Gene." Her eyes smoulder wantonly as she deliberately wets her lower lip with her tongue. I tighten my fingers around her wrist, trying to gain some control. I am nanoseconds away from tearing her nightgown off her golden skin and taking her and the look on her face is all but inviting me to do just that.

"If you want me," her silky whisper echoes my thoughts, "why don't you just take me?"

Oh God, I am losing my mind. Q help me. Because I'm beyond helping myself.

"Marlena," her name rolls around my tongue before spilling out into the space between us. My voice is almost hoarse with longing. She merely smiles knowingly as her eyes sweep my trembling body. Then she lifts her hand to mine and pries my fingers from her. I can't help but gasp as I see the white marks my touch leaves.

This is so insane. I can feel her. I can smell her. The senses are so vivid, how can this be a dream? But how on earth can it be real? Marlena is somewhere away with John. Isn't she?

I reach out, my fingers colliding with her smooth, velvety skin and a moan sounds in her throat, familiar, yet strange at the same time. I meet with the satin strap of her nightgown and my eyes are drawn to hers. The look in them is almost enough to make me come. She's hot and wild and she wants me.

Q/Gene.

The name sounds somewhere in my head as she opens her mouth.
"I need you." Her whisper coils around me, sending rivulets of fire down my veins. "I need you to feel me. Feel how much I want you." She stares at me intently. "I want you to take me. *Now*."

I need no more encouragement and I slip my hand under the satin strap and pull her towards me and onto the bed. I twist so that I am on top of her and kiss her, hard and desperate. My hand finds the warmth of her thigh and I slip it under her nightgown as I press myself against her. I need to feel her. I want her so badly it's hurting.

She groans as I sink my teeth into the delicate flesh of her neck, sucking the fair skin brutally, knowing it will bruise. Or would if this was real. I don't even care what it is anymore. I just need to forget everything except the white heat of the bliss she brings.

My hand follows the soft curves of her and I use my other hand to pull down the neckline of her gown. She lets out a cry as I clamp my teeth roughly on her and her back arches under my touch. I feel her fingers in my hair as I continue to revel in the taste and feel of her and in the sounds of the pleasure I give her.

"Mmmm, Gene," she pants in my ear. "Hurry my love. Hurry." It's all the encouragement I need as I peel the nightgown from her moist, hot body and feast my eyes on her. God, she's as beautiful as I remember and her eyes glow amber green as she stares back at me. There's something.... I shake my head...something about her eyes....they don't quite look right....

But then I feel her hands on me, and I am lost. I groan, my whole body echoing with the sound as I lower myself to her. She's waiting for me and... oh... my... God ... oh... oh... oh God....oh God....

And when I collapse against her, a vague thought crosses my mind. How can something that's so wrong feel this damn good?

It was still dark when they reached their field, but they could both see the precursor of the sun in the east. John spread out the blanket and helped Marlena to lie down, her golden hair tumbling into a smooth pool against the dark wool of the rug as she lay down.

"You're amazing you know that?" he told her as he kneeled down next to her.
"What?" she laughed. "Because I'm mad enough to come out in the middle of the night and sit in a field with you?"
"That and so much more," he sprawled next to her and dipped his nose into the fragrant mass of locks. "So, *so* much more."

She gazed at the mountains to the east, watching as the sky lightened and then turned back to John.
"Do you suppose that we'll still do this kind of thing when we're old and grey?"
"Oh, most definitely," John smiled as he propped himself up on his elbow. "All the time actually. I plan to still be making out with you in the back seat of a car when you're eighty-five."
"Wait just a moment," she laughed. "Somehow the back seat of your Jeep doesn't strike me as the most comfortable place to... `make out' *now*, let alone when I'm eighty-five."
"Well how about here?" John ran his finger down her throat suggestively. "You up for a little nookie as the sun makes it's entrance?"
"Oh what an offer," she felt the breath catch in her throat as his hand trailed lower, cupping the outline of a heavy breast through her sweater. "Here?" she whispered in answer to his questioning look.
"Why not?" he shrugged. "It's not like there's anyone around."

"John we can't!" she protested weakly. In all reality, she was getting turned on just thinking about it, but it wasn't practical. "In case you haven't noticed lately, I'm not exactly athletic in that department."
"You don't have to be Doc," he grinned lasciviously. "I have a plan."
"Oh, of course you do!" She couldn't help the laughter that bubbled through her as he pulled his sweater off.
"You think I'd pass up on opportunity to make love to my beautiful fiancée?" John helped her off with her sweater, pausing to plant a kiss on her nose. "I don't think so."
"Well..." she looked regretful; "I guess we won't be able to do this for much longer." She stared down at the bulge, which was covered by a loose shirt. "I can barely manage now!"
"Well baby, let's make the most of it." John pushed her back on the rug and slipped his leg between hers, effectively pinning her to the ground. But she didn't protest as his lips found hers, sweet and demanding, his tongue moist as it slipped into her mouth, tasting her, familiar but new every time.

Her head felt light as his hand found the bottom of her shirt and untucked it from her track pants. And she felt the moan flourish in her throat as his cool hand negotiated the broad curve of her belly. The moan exploded from her as he found her breast and with deliberate fingers, set about teasing her. At the same time, his lips swept over the soft angle of her jaw and down to her throat where he could feel the quick jump of her pulse under his touch.

The stubble on his chin grazed her as his mouth continued to explore downwards until he was thwarted by the buttons on her shirt. Marlena's only answer was to guide his hands downward to seek the waistband of her track pants. She wasn't in the mood for foreplay; his touch burnt her skin with fiery trails searing their way through her body.

Part of her was still recoiling from her nightmare and she wanted to wash away the fear and the horror. She wanted to feel John's strength and take strength from him. She wanted to feel alive and to feel him moving underneath her. Moving inside her. She wanted to feel his heat and his desire for her and forget everything for just a few divine moments.

John took her lead and pulled the pants down around her hips, his fingers brushing the pale taut skin as he gazed at her quite longingly.
"Too slow," she growled as she kicked off the fleecy pants.
"Doc-"
"Shut up Black," she used one hand to push him onto his back and she deftly unbuttoned the fly of his jeans with skillful fingers.
"Oh God, Marlena!" His words sounded more like a curse as he felt her fingers negotiate the folds of his boxers.
"Shhhh," she smiled mischievously. "You'll wake up the wildlife."
"Screw the wildlife," John exclaimed frustratedly.
"No, that wasn't exactly the idea," she let out a throaty laugh as she pushed up his t-shirt, exposing his broad, sculptured chest.

Before John could say anything else. Marlena dipped her head to his chest, her hot breath only heightening the sense of torture. Oh God, oh Marlena, oh God....oh please...don't...now...oh please... Somehow, the words were all there, they just weren't coming out of his mouth.

It was almost too much for him and he clutched a handful of blanket on one hand as he let a guttural grunt explode from his lips. The sun was peeking over the horizon as Marlena looked up at him, her eyes echoing the golden gleam of the morning light.

"Oh Doc," she heard his whimper, or rather felt it in his throat, as she bent her head, her lips and tongue exploring his roughened skin. "Baby.... oh, oh my God!" His eyes were shut tightly and she could see that he was having trouble controlling himself.

In fact, she was having a hard enough time herself. Every moan he made just seemed to resonate through her, echoing in her growing heat and need to feel him.

The sun was now quarter over the horizon and the countryside around them was flooded with the amber-gold rays of the new day. As she relinquished her touch, John opened his azure eyes and looked up at her. She almost lost her breath at how gorgeous he looked, in the way his eyes drew her in and swamped her like they were an ocean of their own making.

"Here," there was a catch in his throat as he helped her off with her panties. God she looked beautiful with the newborn sunshine caught in her hair and her cheeks flushed with lust. "Do you know how much I love you?" he whispered as she straddled his hips.
"A lot," she answered with a slight smile.
"A real lot," he agreed.

It was long moments before John could form a coherent enough thought that he was able to roll Marlena over onto the rug. Holding her in his arms, he pulled the corner of the rug over her and then brushed his fingers over the bangs that were plastered to her face.

"That wasn't so embarrassing was it?" he whispered with a teasing smile.
"No so much," she answered with a grin of her own. "It was rather a new experience anyway."
"Always do one thing before breakfast that you haven't done before," he laughed as she looked sideways at him, "or something along those lines anyway."
"Sometimes I really wonder about you," her lips struggled to keep the smile subdued but failed miserably.

Shielding her eyes, she turned to look at the horizon. The thin threads of cloud that drifted above the hills did little to obscure the rays of the flaming golden-orange orb and the sight was enough to strike awe into the hardest of hearts.
"That really is incredible," she sighed blissfully.
"Yeah, it is," John whispered into her hair, not even glancing at the sunrise. "Really very, *very* incredible."

Q opened one eye warily and turned awkwardly to look at the window. The sun had risen, maybe an hour ago and he felt like he'd had all of an hour's sleep.

Closing his eyes, he rolled his head back and groaned. Missing the dreams huh? What a complete asshole he was. He had thought that once he was away from her things would get easier. He had hoped that she would stop pervading his every waking moment. And he had prayed that she would stop infecting his dreams. And it seemed that neither had happened. In fact, the dream last night had seemed so real and so intense that it was almost frightening. Maybe he really was losing his mind. Maybe he should run it past Laura Horton and have her lock him up. Not that that would probably stop the dreams.

He opened his eyes with a defeated sigh and swung his feet out of bed. Coffee. Even immortals sometimes needed a kick-start. He pulled on his robe over the boxers and stumbled out of the bedroom, pulling his fingers through chaotic hair as he made his way down to the kitchen.

"Oh hi Gene!" Q felt his heartbeat slow and the sound of the eggshell breaking and the coagulating sizzle as the white hit the hot pan was almost deafening. "You don't look like you slept so good," the sweet Tennessee accent smothered the sound of the cooking food and Lucie's green eyes appeared concerned as she moved in front of him. "Do you want some breakfast? Mike and I are cooking up some bacon and eggs." She smiled confidentially as she leaned closer, "he's not only cute and great in the sack, but he can cook too."

"Uh, excuse me." Gene thought he might be sick as a wave of nausea overcame him and he headed for the bathroom. There he splashed cold water over his face and looked up into the mirror, seeing only haunted eyes buried in sunken sockets. His skin was ashen and he suddenly realized that he was trembling.

Deciding, on reflection, that a shower might do him some good, he locked the door securely and reached into the shower to turn on the faucet. But he caught his breath at the stretching, burning sensation across his back and with a frown; he pulled his arms from the robe and let it hit the floor unhindered.

Turning around, he examined his back in the mirror. What he saw made him pale even further. For scored into his back were fresh scratches that had been made by fingernails.

Fingernails that only existed in a dream.

Kristen stared at the phone, ignoring Maya as she rattled the pots in the background. Where the hell was John and why wasn't he calling her? She'd spoken to him once the other day when he called from his conference in New York. Only a brief call, he'd spoken to Maya for longer than he'd been on the phone to her.

Why the hell would he go away now, of all times? When she was overdue to give birth to their baby after a complicated pregnancy? When they should be finishing off the nursery and deciding on names for the baby?

Pouting, she reached over and picked up the portable, fondling it as she contemplated John's return. She would make him feel *so* guilty for abandoning her here with Badjelly The Witch. Alone and afraid and miserable. If she was going to be miserable, by God he was going to share it.

Maya looked over at Kristen and saw her staring intently at the phone, lost in what passed for thought in that addled head. She could barely believe it when Kristen had come out of the sedation asking for John. She'd appeared to have absolutely no memory of what had passed between them the last time she'd seen him. It was as though her mind had chosen to block out all memory of the incident to protect her from the reality that she had no future with John. Because to Kristen, that was no future at all. All she was and all she ever could be were tied inextricably to John. And when he left her life forever, she would have nothing left.

It was a pretty sad way to be, Maya mused. In some ways she almost felt sorry for Kristen, knowing what her future held. But then, she'd brought it all on herself. She had sacrificed her integrity, her self-respect and everything she possessed for a lie. For something that she'd convinced herself actually existed. In defining herself by the man she had coveted, she'd defined herself out of existence. Because the woman that John had once loved had been lost forever once she'd succumbed to the innate DiMera traits that Stefano had imbued in her years earlier. Shaking her head, Maya turned back to her task chopping onions for the quiche she was making for dinner.

Kristen waited until Maya was no longer watching and then she quietly pushed herself off the sofa. Supporting her huge belly with one hand, she slowly made her way up the stairs. That bitch thought she was stupid. Thought she didn't know when she was being watched. Well, she wasn't about to let some jumped up Italian tart control her every move.

It was bad enough not being able to get out of the loft. If she even *looked* like she was thinking about it, Herr Maya was there, practically packing an Ouzi in order to stop her. Well, she'd show her. She'd show them all.

Dropping heavily onto her bed, she stared at the phone again. She had already tried calling the hotel he had been at twice, but both times he was apparently out. And the New York branch of Alamain Industries were only prepared to say that he couldn't be reached in the meetings he was attending.

How convenient. The little niggling voice at the back of her mind was becoming louder as the hours slunk by. How do you know they're telling you the truth? But where else would he be? Why would he go to all that trouble of having everyone lie for him? Unless...

Her lips thinned as she stared at the phone. Was it possible? Was John's business trip simply a front for him to go away with someone else? With *her*?

With jaggedly broken nails, Kristen stabbed at the buttons on the phone and then lifted it to her ear. A scowl settled on her face as she waited, the phone ringing resonantly in her ear. That's right, you're not there are you? You're with John, you thieving, whoring sl-

"Hello?" Marlena's sounded tired even over the phone. Caught off-guard, Kristen just sat there, staring at her reflection in the mirror in surprise. "Hello, is anybody there? Hello?" She heard Marlena's sigh of exasperation as she hung up and she let the phone drop slowly in front of her.

So if Marlena was home then where was John? Was he actually working like he said?

She blinked convulsively as she saw herself in the mirror. She looked terrible, her hair stringy and oily and her skin a sallow shade of pale. Her grey eyes were vacant and lifeless, adding to the general two-dimensional look of her. The cotton top she wore was stretched tightly over her rounded stomach and the tiny life that resided within, and she suffered with the heat so that perspiration had seeped in yellowed circles under her arms. It was no wonder that John wanted to get away from her. When she looked like this, how could she blame him?

She hated being pregnant now. Actually, she even hated the baby. She resented the fact that John seemed to care more about the child than about her and she hated the physical inconvenience of being pregnant. When she actually had the little brat, she planned to hand it straight over to the nanny and then get herself back into shape for when John returned to her bed. She wasn't going to spend any more time with the little demon than she had to.

Easing herself off the bed, she headed for the stairs. It was probably time she went and showered. Maybe if she took care of herself a little more, acted a little more like herself, John wouldn't be in such a hurry to go and work all the time.

But her stomach sank when the familiar laugh reached her at the bottom of the staircase. He's home.

Her thrill at the knowledge that Marlena was in the penthouse suddenly dissolved as the ramifications echoed around her muddled mind.

I'm sorry Ms. DiMera, he can't be disturbed... In meetings all day... Away from the hotel... Cannot be contacted today...

Kristen's jaw set solidly as her hands gripped the handrail. She could hear him laugh at Maya's questions and words filtered back to her. Wonderful... relaxing... just what the doctor ordered.... Her breathing shortened as she lowered her shaking body to the edge of the step. She closed her eyes, trying to squeeze out the pain, but the unavoidable truth swirled around the blackened void of her mind. He's been with *her*. He'd been lying to her all this time, she knew it. She could feel it in the cold, dead place where her heart used to live.

Finally, she opened her eyes a steely resolve burning behind the calculating grey eyes. She would have to be careful not to let him see that she knew. If he knew she suspected he would be careful to hide every shred of evidence. But if he was complacent, he would slip up and she would find out. And then..... well then, things would get interesting.

"Oh man," Marlena sank back against the downy pillows on her bed and closed her eyes. "I have missed my babies *so* much."
"They've missed you too," Lucie was hanging up the rest of Marlena's clothes, a task she had insisted that Marlena was too exhausted to take care of herself. "Ah, and here's proof."

She laughed as Belle came running in with her rabbit and climbed onto her mother's bed.
"You're supposed to be getting ready for bed baby girl," Marlena tried to sound disapproving, but in truth, she couldn't get enough of her little girl. She would be happy to hold Belle in her arms all night if she could.
"Wanned 'novver cuddle," Belle crawled into her mother's arms and looked up at her with brilliant baby-blue eyes. "I missed you Mommy."
"Oh I missed you too baby," Marlena drew her precious, precocious little girl into a warm embrace and kissed her. "I thought about you each and every day."
"Miss Gene too," Belle said innocently as she cuddled up to Marlena. "When's Gene coming home?"

"Oh," Marlena was a little taken aback as she looked down at the comfortable child who was curled up next to her. Then she looked up at Lucie, the young woman's green eyes signaling her own surprise.
"She never said anything before," she shrugged. "I sure don't think I said anything to make her think..."
"I'm sure you didn't," Marlena stroked Belle's flaxen curls. "Belle honey, Gene isn't coming home." The little girl lifted her head again, her eyes questioning her mother's reply. "He's gone to stay somewhere else sweet girl."

The hurt in Belle's eyes hit her square in the middle of her guilt and she felt her own misery over the situation suddenly seep back into her awareness. She had been able to avoid thinking about it while she was away but now she had to deal with all the questions and problems that it engendered and she wasn't sure how to even begin.

"Doesn't he nub us any more?" Belle's well-defined pout was getting a workout as confused tears filled her eyes.
"Oh of *course* he does sweetheart." There wasn't anything Marlena hated more than to see her children hurting, but she knew this was probably unavoidable. She just had to try and make it as gentle as she could. "He loves you very, *very* much. He loves you so much it was really hard for him to go." She stroked the little girl's head as she lay it back down on Marlena's chest. "But he couldn't stay here any more. I promise you it's got nothing to do with you or Brady."

"Issit cos Daddy don't like him?" Belle asked sleepily.
"Doesn't like him," Marlena corrected automatically, surprised once again but the words from her smallest daughter. "Why would you say Daddy doesn't like him sweetheart?"
"Dey was souting at Gwanma 'n Gwanpa's." Belle yawned. "I heared them. Daddy was real mad."
"Was he?" Marlena frowned pensively. "When did you hear them shouting baby girl?"
"Don't know," Belle shrugged. A toddler's grip on time wasn't exactly expansive, Marlena knew.
"That's okay honey," Marlena whispered. "Daddy just got a little mad. It doesn't mean he doesn't like Eugene. They just don't agree sometimes. Like sometimes Daddy and I might shout a little because we don't agree. But it doesn't mean we don't like each other. Do you understand what I mean?"
"Fink so," Belle nodded sleepily.

"All right then, why don't you go and get changed and bring a book back here for me to read to you?" she suggested gently.
"Okay," Belle perked up at the idea of a story and she scrambled off the bed, stopping only to grab her rabbit.
"Don't run near the stairs," Marlena called after her but the little girl was already out of sight.

"Lucie, you haven't seen Gene have you?" Marlena tried to phrase her question as though it was a normal turn of the conversation.
"Why yeah, I have," Lucie turned back to her employer. "Mr. and Mrs. Brady took the kids on my night off on Tuesday night and I stayed the night at Dr. Mike's." Her lips twitched and Marlena wasn't quite sure what that signified. "You do know he's staying with Mike and Laura Horton don't you?"
"Yes," Marlena nodded, relieved that it'd been Laura that had taken Eugene in. She knew he had the ability to rub some people up the wrong way, but she could trust Laura to make sure that he was okay. "How did he seem?"

"Kinda weird to be quite honest," Lucie shrugged. "He came into the kitchen, took one look at me and couldn't get out of there fast enough." She sighed unhappily. "Maybe it was just me. I get the feeling he doesn't like me you know."
"Oh I'm sure that's not true," Marlena tried to sound reassuring but she'd picked up the tension between Gene and Lucie before and she could well understand why the girl would think that. In fact she suspected that Lucie could be right. It wasn't the first time Eugene had taken an irrational disliking to someone. In fact, it reminded her rather a lot of when he'd first fallen for Calliope.

Shaking her head, she put the thought out of her mind. "It's a complicated situation Lucie. Things are just very awkward at the moment. He probably just didn't expect to see you right then."
"Yeah, I guess so," Lucie's southern drawl seemed a little subdued as she hung the last blouse in the armoire. "Well, I think I'll go and see how those kiddies are doing."
"All right then," Marlena didn't know what else to say to the girl and judged that it was probably best that she didn't say anything more right now. Without going into the whole relationship between she and Gene it was fairly much impossible anyway.

She watched the young woman sweep her bobbed blonde hair from her eyes as she left the room and she sighed. She was going to have to find Gene and talk to him, that much was obvious.

"Hi there baby," John felt his flesh start to crawl as he heard Kristen's voice. He had been dreading this moment, knowing that there was no way he could avoid it. Somehow to him it signaled the end of the wonderful holiday with the woman he loved and the beginning of an incarceration of kinds with this creature. And it wasn't exactly something he was looking forward to.

"Hi honey," he turned around, a false smile plastered on his face. "How are you feeling?"
"Like a whale." His smile didn't reach his blue-grey eyes and she found it difficult to maintain the façade herself. Cracking a smile and a slight laugh, she hugged him. "I've missed you."
"I've missed you too." He patted her awkwardly on the back. "I'm sorry I had to go away, the crisis at work just wouldn't wait."
"Oh I understand," she nodded her head complacently as she pulled away from him. "I was worried you wouldn't get back before the baby came though."
"I was only a plane ride away," he told her reassuringly. "So how is my little tyke doing in there?" He patted her stomach, trying to envisage the baby that curled within. Would it have Marlena's eyes or maybe her beautiful smile? He couldn't wait to find out. Not least because it meant he would be released from this torture.

"I'm kinda worried that he hasn't been born yet," Kristen waddled over to the sofa and picked up the baby clothes that were piled up there. "Don't you think that three weeks is too much?"
"The doctor says it's okay, the baby isn't in any danger sweetheart," John slid his arm around her shoulders. "I'm sure if they thought there was a problem they would induce labour. But they want to give it the best start, you know that."
"I know," she sighed heavily. "I'm just tired of being so huge. It's exhausting."
"I know," he nodded, his voice so gentle and understanding that Kristen almost found herself believing that he cared. Almost.

"Will you stay here with me tomorrow?" she asked carefully
"Well, I have to go into work and tie up a few loose ends in the morning," he said with a hint of regret. "But I'll be back after lunch and we can spend the afternoon together. How does that sound?"
"Work?" Kristen looked slightly doubtful but she appeared to relax as she thought about it. "Okay baby, I'll take what I can get."
"Good," John grinned as he turned back to Maya. "So what's for dinner, it smells great."

Kristen glared at his back for a moment and then turned away. Everything was falling into place. The way he was never there, the way he was so quick to dismiss her as soon as he could possibly end a conversation. The way he looked at her, or rather *didn't* look at her these days. It all added up to one thing.

And now Kristen just had to work out how to deal with that one thing. Because she wasn't about to let anything stand in her way, now that she was so close to having what she had coveted for so long.

Not now..... Not ever.....

"Oh hi honey!" Laura's voice sounded down the phone line. "How did your trip go?"
"Uh," Marlena didn't quite know what to say, she wasn't aware that Laura knew she had gone away. And if she knew that, what else did she know? Not that Marlena *minded* her knowing it was just....

"Oh honey, I....Gene and Roman told me everything."
"Everything?" Marlena repeated, a little dazed at the prospect.
"Well, about you and John and the baby and..." Marlena could almost hear her excited friend shaking her head in glee at the prospect. "Well we're just going to have to get together so that you can fill in all the gaps for me okay?"
"Okay," Marlena couldn't contain the smile that broke out on her face. She'd had to keep this a secret from nearly everyone she loved for so long now, the thought of being able to share it with a close friend like Laura was more than tempting. "How about tomorrow? You should come over for lunch."
"Sounds divine," Laura mentally ticked off the date in her calendar.

"Laura, is Gene there?" Marlena was too tired to try subtlety in changing the subject.
"No honey, he's been out all day. He said he'd be home later, after dinner."
"Where would he be all day?" Marlena frowned. It wasn't like he had a job to go to, or was even friendly with that many people in Salem.
"I don't know, I didn't think it was my place to ask," Laura sounded a little subdued.
"Laura, is he all right?" Marlena's concern slipped through her voice. "I mean, to you does he seem okay?"
"He seems a little down, but I think he'll be okay," Laura was sensitive to her friend's worry and she wouldn't exacerbate it any more if she could possibly help it. "He's obviously missing you but he's doing his best to get on with things."

"I'm worried about him Laura," Marlena confided. "It's been so difficult for us all and I just....." she sighed deeply, "he got the worst of it and I can't even help him because it's all my fault."
"I very much doubt it's your fault Marlena," Laura said firmly. "And he is a grown-up. He's doing fine and it will get easier for him."
"I hope so," Marlena whispered, suddenly feeling very alone.

"Perhaps we should talk about this tomorrow too," Laura suggested gently. "If you tell me what happened, perhaps I can help him a little more. And you too. Sounds like you could use a friend who's not so involved."
"Yeah," Marlena conceded with a nod. "Thanks Laura, that sounds nice."
"All right then, I have to go now, but I'll see you tomorrow. About midday?"
"Mmmmm," Marlena nodded, settling back into her pillows. "I'll see you then."

Hanging up the phone, she looked at the darkened sky outside the window. Another night alone. She had gotten used to waking with John beside her over the past week. But now, once again, she was on her own. And until the baby that Kristen carried was born, that was how it would be.

She shivered at the thought. John had arranged for a guard outside the building and one in the lobby outside her apartment. But somehow that didn't make her feel a lot safer.

Because somewhere out there, Stefano watched and he waited. And she knew, with a feeling in her gut that she remembered only too well, he would come for her. He always did.

This time, she just had to be ready for him.

Marlena barely had time to think as she raised her hands to ward off the blows from the deranged harridan in front of her. The words, although distorted by the harshness of the screaming, still registered and real, cold fear echoed inside her gut. If she'd doubted John's belief that Kristen was a danger before, she didn't now.

Adrenaline swept through her blood, sending her pulse racing and drying her mouth. She fended off a blow from Kristen, only to miss a slap that caught her square on. The whole side of her face, including her nose, was numb for a moment as her mind reeled. It was only when she tasted the salty, metallic sharpness of blood on her tongue that feeling seeped back into her face, the pain from the blow causing her knees to buckle.

She groped for the door handle through the red haze that clouded her senses, hoping that by some miracle, she could keep herself upright. But oddly, she found a strong, warm arm and hands that supported her. She could still hear Kristen's wails, but somehow, they seemed removed.

It seemed like an eternity before her vision cleared enough to realize that she was practically in Peter Blake's arms. Kristen flailed at his impassive back as he looked down at Marlena with conflicted eyes.

"Are you all right?" he asked with surprising concern. Marlena could only nod as she touched her fingers to her lips. They came away reddened with her own blood and she painfully ran her dry tongue over the split in the delicate skin.

Relieved, Peter shifted his attention to Kristen, turning around and capturing her wrists in an iron grip.
"That's *enough* Kristen," he told her in a voice that sounded very much like a command. It seemed to work as she looked up at him, a dazed confusion registering in her grey-green eyes.

"I'm sorry about all this Marlena," Peter tossed the inadequate apology over his shoulder. "This pregnancy has put quite a strain on her." Well, it was mostly true. He was just glad that the man he had watching Marlena's building had been intelligent enough to think to call him when he had seen Kristen entering the front doors.

"Please," Marlena gasped, not sure if she wanted to throw up or pass out. "Just get her out of here."
"Sure," Peter nodded his head, not particularly wanting to wait around here anyway. "C'mon Krissy, let's go."

He tugged on her arm and she took a step towards the open doorway. Then, without warning, she stopped and turned, fixing hard eyes on Marlena.
"I meant what I said," she said in a chillingly assured voice.
"Kristen!" Peter hissed as he pulled on her arm leading her out of the penthouse. He said nothing else, but turned and glanced apologetically at Marlena before he punched the elevator button.

Marlena touched her face gingerly as she shut the door behind her and flinched at the pain that her fingers elicited. Looking down, she saw that her hands were shaking and suddenly the rest of her body seemed to join in as the shock of what had just happened, hit her.

She made it to the sofa before her knees gave way and she caught the corner of the furniture with her hands as she sank to the ground.

"Oh God," she whispered as her eyes filled with terrified tears. It was as though everything John had predicted was coming true and she didn't know what to do. For all her education, for all her years practicing, suddenly she was as lost as she had ever been. And for some reason, all she could do was think of Hart Bennett and how she had not known how to deal with him. And how it had ended so tragically.

A tiny squirm inside her should have been soothing, but it just seemed to aggravate her distress. Suddenly, she couldn't hold on to her fear any longer and it spilled out as hot tears that stung her abraded skin. Flinging her head down on her arms on the sofa she began to cry, uttering loud, choking sobs that were swallowed up by the empty apartment.

It wasn't so much what had just happened that was the cause of her distress. It was more that Marlena felt as though was the last straw in a stressful situation that she had no idea how to deal with. This thing had been going on for so long now, since they had returned from Aremid and Marlena was just completely exhausted. She didn't understand why life couldn't be simple, why John and she couldn't be together, be a family like they deserved to be.

She just wanted to wake up in his arms in the morning, watch the sun rise like they had in West Virginia, send the children off to school after breakfast together like normal parents as part of a normal family. Surely, that wasn't too much to ask.

So why was it that it seemed so impossible to grasp?

She jumped as the telephone chimed behind her and lifting her head, she wiped her face miserably. Taking a deep breath, she tried to calm the shaking which she knew would translate into her voice and picked up the receiver.

"Hello?"
"Hey beautiful," John's velvety voice echoed in her ear.
"Hi," her voice dropped to a barely audible whisper and John knew instantly that something was wrong. It wasn't so much her voice, or how she sounded, it was just that instantly he *knew*. In fact, he had really known before he had called her. That niggling feeling of uneasiness in the pit of his stomach was what had made him pick up the phone and dial her number in the first place.

"Doc," his voice conveyed everything he was thinking and more. "Doc, baby what's wrong? Are you okay?"
"I'm okay." The tremor gave her away and John's brow creased in concern.
"Doc, you're not okay. Now tell me what's going on." He paused for a moment and then continued, waylaying any further stalling on her part. "Talk to me Marlena or I'm coming straight over."

"Kristen was here," she shook as she said Kristen's name, her hand rising in an unconscious gesture to her mouth, where her lips were already puffy and tender. She winced as she thought about Kristen's mania. Her voice was raw and anxious as she spoke her next words. "She knows John. She knows about us."
"What?!" John's heart leapt into his throat. "What do you mean she knows?"
"She said she knew about the baby." Marlena's whisper was tenuous and her throat tightened as she replayed the words in her mind. "That she saw pictures and read letters you wrote to the baby."

"Oh God," John groaned, remembering the stash of letters he had written before the truth had come out between he and Marlena, along with the ultrasound and Marlena's appointment schedule. He'd hidden them in the bottom of one of his drawers and he knew Kristen must have gone searching to find them. "What did you say to her?" he asked softly.
"I told her that the baby was Gene's," her voice was stronger now but John could hear the fear that was underlying her words and he wished he were there to take her in his arms and calm her. "I told her that she was imagining things... and, and I asked her why you would be with her..." she took a harsh breath, trying to pace herself but the fear was rising again and she struggled with her words. "I tried to tell her... it wouldn't make sense if I was having your baby... but John, she really wasn't buying it." She took another deep breath in an attempt to calm herself and it seemed to work momentarily. "You were right to be worried about her, she's extremely unstable."

"What did she say Marlena?" John knew that she wasn't telling him everything. He knew her so well; he didn't even have to hear the inflections in her voice to gather that. The control that she had garnered, even during the short course of the conversation, was enough to tip him off that she wasn't being completely forthcoming. "What did she say to you?"

"She said she knew and that I wasn't going to have you," she still sounded anxious, however much she was trying to hide it and John ached to hold her. "John, I'm really frightened she might do something stupid. Peter followed her up here and he took her away but I'm not sure if he realizes how close to the edge she is."
"Peter Blake?" John sounded confused. "What was he doing there? Why would he be there too?"
"I don't know." She sounded alone, vulnerable and frightened John hated to hear that in her tone. "I'm just glad he did."
"Doc, baby, did she say something to you?" he asked, worry intensifying as he heard each one of her strained words. "Did she threaten you in some way?"

"It's not important exactly what she said," Marlena told him quickly, unable to hide the quaver that shook her voice. "It doesn't matter, I'm okay. You need to find her and convince her that she's not going to lose you." She knew she was babbling but she needed him to understand how urgent this was. "If you get angry with her now, it's only going to confirm her suspicions. I don't know how you can do it...."

"Doc, I don't know that you are okay." Her breathless words only served to increase his concern. "You don't sound okay to me. I'm worried about you sweetheart and I'd rather come over there and be with you. Peter's with her, she'll be fine."
"No John, I'm not sure she will be fine," Marlena said, the fear echoing again in her voice. "I'm scared that she'll do something stupid, something to get your attention." She began to tremble again as she remembered Kristen's fury and the feral glare in her eyes. "I'm frightened for our baby, John. Please."

He paused for a long moment, torn between his need to be with her and make sure that she was all right and Marlena's plea for their child. Of course, she knew that he could never refuse her a request, especially when it was so heartfelt and when the safety of their baby was at stake.....

With a small sigh, he nodded.
"Okay Doc, I'll go and check on her but after I make sure everything is okay with her, I'm coming back to see you and get the whole story okay?"
"Okay," Marlena nodded, allowing her shoulders to drop in a disclosure of relief. "Just be careful John. She's not lucid."
"I will, baby," his soft voice was reassuring and she felt her anxiety start to dissipate. She trusted him to take care of Kristen and the baby she carried. After the stress of the encounter with Kristen this morning, now it was time to stop worrying and start making sure this baby here was all right.

She ran a gentle hand over the light cotton that clothed her bulging stomach and smiled slightly, wincing when the angry throb in her lip and cheek reasserted itself.
"I miss you," she whispered almost inaudibly.
"Miss you too, baby," his silky voice made her want to curl up so that it could envelop her, as though it could somehow protect her from everything bad that wanted to overwhelm her right now. "I'll see you soon."

When John arrived at the loft, Maya was sitting on the sofa with her head in her hands, staring at the floor. He couldn't see any sign of Kristen and Peter and he wasn't sure for a moment if that was a good or a bad thing.

"What happened Maya?" he demanded without preamble. "How did she get out of here?"
"She tricked me and locked me in the bedroom," Maya raised miserable russet eyes to her employer. "I'm sorry, I should have known better. I let my guard down and she took advantage of it."
"She's here?" he asked, not bothering to assuage her guilt.
"In her room with her brother," Maya twisted the ring that adorned her thumb. She couldn't believe she had been so stupid and it was only by the grace of God that nothing serious had happened. At least she *hoped* nothing serious had happened.
"We'll talk about this later," the hardness in John's voice sent the nervous anxiety inside her into overdrive. She couldn't afford to get fired, not now.

Ignoring the tenseness of the young woman, John moved through the living room toward the stairs. He could hear Kristen and Peter arguing, even from the base of the staircase and his own stomach tossed nervously. He had no idea how to retrieve any kind of stability from this situation and his hand gripped the handrail tightly as the flight instinct won out over the fight for several long moments.

And then he recalled the fear and pleading in Marlena's voice as she begged him to check on Kristen. She was genuinely fearful for their child's life and John couldn't walk away from that, as much as instinct told him to.

With a deep breath, he started up the stairs.

Marlena flinched as the knock came at the door and she roused herself from where she lay on the forgiving softness of the sofa. Her head ached dully and her lip was parched and painful where she had held a tissue to it to staunch the flow of blood. She hadn't dared to look in a mirror yet to assess any further damage. She didn't want to be reminded of what a hash she had made of the situation any sooner than she had to be.

"Marlena?" Laura's softly feminine voice drifted through the closed door, enfolding her in the imbued concern. Marlena looked up in shock and then looked at the clock. She had totally forgotten that Laura was coming to lunch. There was another knock at the door and then a pause. "Marlena, are you there?"

"Just a moment Laura," her voice was gravelly and strained as she pushed herself up, the spongy cushion giving way awkwardly under her hand. Looking down, she cursed softly as she saw the spots of blood that she had missed. Blood that now manifestly stained the soft lime fabric of her dress.

She pushed tousled hair out of her face as she made her way to the mirror. The visage she saw reflected in the looking glass was as bad as she had expected and she groaned, the noise settling deep in her throat. Bruising was already taking shape around her eye and blood was crusted at the bottom of her still numb nose. Her lower lip was swollen and dark with clotted blood, contrasting with the ashen pallor of her skin and reddened eyes.

"Oh man," she whispered, realizing that there was no time for her to get cleaned up before she let Laura in. Not that there was much she could do to hide this anyway.

"Marlena, honey, are you okay?" Laura was getting antsy on the other side of the door and Marlena knew that there was no way she was going to avoid the inevitable inquisition that was going to take place when Laura saw her.

With a sigh, she walked slowly to the door, mentally cataloguing the various aches and pains as she went. Turning the lock, she opened the door to face her friend.

Laura's expression, schooled into one of happy greeting, immediately fell, shocked disquiet replacing her expectation of sharing in Marlena's good news.

"Marlena, my God, what happened?"

"Kristen you can't be serious!" Peter stared at his sister in shock.
"Never more so brother dearest." She whirled away from him, her eyes cold and dead as she stared out of the window. "How else can I assure the future of my family?"
"Krissy, you *can't*." He felt a chill shimmer through him. He had seen Kristen desperate, but never this desperate.

"I can do anything I *damn* well please," she hissed. "That bitch has destroyed my life.... well maybe a little turn about is fair play."
"She hasn't destroyed it.... for God's sake Kristen, you can't blame her for everything that's gone wrong. You knew a long time ago that John loved her. You've just been hanging onto a fantasy ever since."

"Don't you *dare* tell me what I can and can't do," Kristen turned on him angrily. "If you won't back me up then you can f*cking well go to hell." She narrowed her eyes, glaring nastily at him. "I don't need you anyway."

They both started at the sound of the door and turned to find John standing at the threshold of the room.
"Could I speak to Kristen please?" he addressed the question to Peter, who was more than glad to get out of the room. What with Kristen having lost all her marbles apparently and with John looking at a loss, he figured at the best, he'd have to pick up the pieces at some point. He'd just rather it wasn't right now.
"Sure," he muttered as he dodged out of the room almost gratefully.

"So?" Kristen placed her hands on her hips and glared at John, openly hostile.
"What?" John wasn't about to blurt out the truth unless he had to.
"Don't treat me like I'm stupid John, I've had enough of that. I suppose your precious Marlena has called you by now, complaining about the big bad Kristen."

"I heard about what happened," he said carefully.
"Did you hear how I found your precious letters and pictures?" her lips curled into an ugly scowl. She stomped to the bed where she'd dropped the bundle that she had collected when she and Peter had arrived back. Even faced with the proof, Peter had refused to become outraged on her behalf. She had been counting on him. Now she had to do what she had to do, alone.

"Yes, that's right," she registered the apprehensive expression on John's face and she scooped up the pile of papers. "I *know*. I know that you've been *lying* to me. I *know* that that bloody bastard your precious *Doc* carries is *yours*!" Her voice wound up to a screech and she hurled the letters at him furiously.

John could do nothing but look at her as a few remaining crisp papers fluttered lazily to the ground. He couldn't stand her and he momentarily wondered why he had found her so irresistible at one time. She wasn't even attractive anymore. She was a spent, sad, vicious crone and the sooner she was out of his life, the better.

"What, cat got your tongue?" she taunted disdainfully. "Don't know what line to spin the poor gullible Kristen now huh?"
"Kristen, it's not like that," he started softly.
"Well, what *is* it like John," she screamed angrily. "Why don't you tell me exactly *how* I fit into your plans now that wh*re is having your baby too."
"Kristen, the fact that Marlena got pregnant accidentally, the fact that she *is* having my baby doesn't change the fact that I am committed to you." He hoped he could pull off the boldfaced lies, because they were about as far from the truth as he could go.

"Oh yeah, that's right, how could I forget," she laughed bitterly, the sound ringing with madness. "You're so in love with me you can't wait to get away from me every day. You won't sleep with me, kiss me or God forbid, even touch me." She scowled at him, her eyes portraying a mixture of proprietary and hatred. "It's obvious you can't stand me, so why do you even bother trying?"
"Kristen, honey, you know I missed out on so much work when I was in the hospital. I really have to catch up on that stuff, I can't help it." He moved closer to her, his posture deliberately trained into a likeness of supplication.

Kristen looked at him suspiciously. She wanted to believe him, but how could she, when every nerve in her body screamed at her that he was still lying?
"If that's true then why did you lie to me?" She grasped the bedstead with gnarled fingers. "You've obviously been to appointments with *her*," she waved her free arm at the papers scattered on the floor around John. "You've been sneaking around behind my back for *months*. Why should I believe *anything* you say?"

"Baby," the endearment stuck in John's throat and he had to force himself to carry on. "I'm sorry, I should have told you the truth. But I didn't know how to tell you. I didn't find out for the longest time and when I did," he sighed and shrugged, "I know how insecure you are about our relationship and I'm sorry if that's my fault too. I just didn't want to hurt you and I knew how you would feel about Marlena having my baby." He was silent but Kristen matched it with a stare that dared him to finish his explanation. He cleared his throat and curled his fists as he shoved them into his pockets. "I knew you would see her as a threat and with the pregnancy as delicate as it was, I just wanted to spare you as much stress as I could."

"And Marlena went along with that out of the goodness of her heart?" Kristen asked disbelievingly.
"Doc knows I am committed to you, Kristen. She wouldn't ask me to break up the family we are creating. And she has Eugene now anyway. The baby might not be his, but he will bring it up as if it were."
"And you can do that?" Kristen raised her eyebrows. "Watch another man bring up your child and not be involved."
"If I have to." She could hear the strain in his voice and her mind ticked over as she watched him shift uncomfortably before her.

You're lying John. You're lying and someone is going to be punished because of it.

"Kristen did this to you?" Laura was horrified as she helped Marlena sit down on the sofa.
"It's a long story Laura," Marlena said, exhaustion suffusing her words.
"Did she find out the truth about you and John?" Laura asked quietly.
"She found out that this is John's baby and she pretty much guessed everything else," Marlena replied despondently, her hand resting on the rounded curve of her belly. "I tried to tell her she was mistaken but she wouldn't buy it."
"And she attacked you?" Laura lifted her hand to Marlena's face to examine the bruising but pulled away as Marlena flinched.
"She's psychotic Laura. If Peter hadn't arrived, God only knows what would have happened." A small shudder ran through Marlena as she considered the possible outcomes of what had occurred. None of them were particularly pleasant.

"You've told John about this." It was a statement rather than a question.
"I told him she came over, yes."
"But you didn't tell him that she hit you?" Laura was stunned for the second time since she had arrived. "Marlena, why ever not? Surely you know he'd be right over here if you told him."
"That's why I couldn't," Marlena was hoarse as she stared at her hands, which were fiddling nervously. "He needed to go and make sure Kristen was all right first."
"But what about you?" Laura asked with a touch of annoyance in her voice. "I think you deserve more of his attention than Kristen does."

"Laura, it's not that easy," Marlena looked over at her friend struggling to think through the ache that clouded her mind. "There's something else that Kristen doesn't know. Somehow, and don't ask me how because I really can't explain it, but she's carrying *my* baby too. A baby that is genetically John's and mine. So you see, I can't just write her off and pretend she doesn't exist and neither can John."
"What?" Laura wondered vaguely why revelations like these always came in threes. "How.... how is that possible?"
"I don't know," Marlena shrugged her shoulders. "Laura, I really don't know, but Mike confirmed it for us so it's true."

Laura's face flashed with emotion as she struggled to make sense of what Marlena was telling her. She was confused and she was angry, but most of all, she was deeply concerned about Marlena right now.

"Let me get some thing to clean those cuts," she offered finally.
"All right," Marlena watched her shed her light linen jacket and make her way to the bathroom and then she shook her head. Everything was such a mess. She didn't understand how it had got that way so fast. Not that this hadn't been going on for what seemed like forever. But all of a sudden, everything seemed to be slipping out of her grasp and it frightened her.

She heard Laura re-enter the room and she forced herself to drop the train of thought as her friend kneeled down in front of her.
"All right honey," Laura lifted a warm washcloth to her face, "this might sting a little."

Marlena winced as Laura dabbed at the blood that was crusted under her nose and on her lips.
"There's not going to be much that we can do about the bruising at this point, I can get some ice if you want." She put down the cloth and gently applied some antiseptic cream to the cuts that marred Marlena's lips.

"Laura, I couldn't tell him," Marlena retreated to the previous conversation quietly. "You know how he is, how protective he gets. If he knew Kristen had even threatened me, let alone hurt me, he wouldn't be able to go through this charade any longer."
"So you play silent martyr again Marlena?"
"I have to." Her hazel eyes were dark with sorrow. "Laura, she tried to kill herself when she thought John had left her and she very nearly succeeded." She took Laura's hand and squeezed it. "Laura, you know I can't put my baby at risk. I just can't do it."

Laura looked down at the carpet and then at Marlena again.
"You know, I just can't bear to see you putting yourself second all the time. I want so badly to see you get the happiness you deserve and I hate that you always put everyone else first." She sighed deeply as she saw the pain in Marlena's golden eyes. She loved her friend so dearly, she would do anything to help her. "I am trying to understand though."

"You're a wonderful friend," Marlena managed a taut smile but it was followed by a slight flinch as the pain sent an unwelcome reminder across her chafed nerves. "I know you care and I'm *so* grateful for it."
"You know I'll always be here if you need me," Laura returned Marlena's smile with a gentle one of her own. Marlena was always so good to those around her, if only she could be as good to herself.
"For what it's worth, John is coming back here when he's done at Kristen's," Marlena shrugged her shoulders tightly. She hoped he was anyway. Who knew what was going on over at the loft and if he was going to be able to get away.

The thought that she might not see him wasn't exactly heartening and Marlena felt her hands tremble involuntarily.
"Honey, it's okay to let it out," Laura prompted her softly. "You've just been through a very stressful experience."

"I'm okay," Marlena nodded stoically, drawing her hands away from Laura in an effort to compose herself. "I... when Kristen left.... before you came over..." She looked at her friend with sad eyes. "There are only so many tears, Laura."
"Well just remember that you don't have to be strong with me, *or* with John. We know better than to expect you to be superhuman," her lips took on a quirky smile. "To tell you the truth, sometimes it's nice to know you're not perfect. Means there's some hope for the rest of us."
"Oh Laura," a tiny chuckle slipped from Marlena's throat. Then she became serious again as she laid her hand over Laura's. "Thank you. But I can't say that by the time this whole nightmare is over you won't think I'm anything *but* perfect."

"Anytime you need my shoulder honey," Laura tilted her head to one side, "you know where I am. But I think what you *really* need to do is trust in John. He knows what's important and I think you can trust that he won't let you down again."
"You think he's learnt his lesson?" Marlena asked with amusement.
"He better have, or he'll have all the Brady's and Horton's to answer to!" Laura grinned. "But really, I think he loves you deeply and he knows what it's like to lose you. He won't ever risk that again."

"I don't think he will either." Marlena let out a long, slow breath. "I don't want to contemplate my life without him Laura. Now I have him back...." She shook her head, a sliver of real, tangible fear slipping through the emotional armour she had erected. "Until I know for sure Stefano is dead, I'll never be able to be secure in our future."
"Just hang on in there honey," Laura pulled her into a hug. "Things will get better soon, I promise you. Roman and Abe will find Stefano and then things will be okay. You just have to have faith."

"Can you forgive me?" John asked carefully. "I really am sorry baby."

Kristen looked at him, still processing her options through her mind. If she told him the truth, that she didn't believe him and likely never would, he would leave her and go to Marlena. That much was sure. But if she played along, she could buy herself some time. Some time to deal with the problem at hand. Some time to make sure the problem would never be a problem again.

"You swear you love me?" she asked pointedly.
"Yes, I love you, I promise," John didn't know how he had it in him to lie so easily, but he managed it.
"You promise you and I and this baby will be a family?"
"I promise Kristen. I love this baby and I'm committed to its mother. We will be a very happy family, I can promise you that." However dire the situation, John was a man of his word, and if he could help it, he didn't want to make vows he couldn't keep.

"All right then," she said softly as she held out her arms. "I forgive you."
"You don't know how happy that makes me," John wrapped his arms around her, trying to relax his tensing muscles.
"I can only imagine," Kristen whispered, resting her head against his shoulder.

Not as happy as it will make me when I see Dr. Marlena Evans Brady dead and buried.

For there was only one way to ensure Marlena and her spawn would never be a threat again. And Kristen had no qualms about carrying through with her plans.

When she was done, Marlena would be dead and John would be hers forever.

A Severed Thread